The father sets up a different but predictable behavioral system with the baby. By the age of 3-4 weeks his rhythm with the baby is clear and differentiated from the one mother and infant have developed together.
Drs. Suzanne Dixon and Michael Yogman in the Child Development Unit at Boston Children’s Hospital have found that fathers are more likely to use a playful approach, and to “jazz a baby up” by heightening the rhythm the baby sets. They tap different parts of her body in rhythmic games, they speak in more heightened rhythms, and they exaggerate facial expressions in ways that seem to say to the baby, “Now, let’s play!” A small baby first watches quietly as she stars such a period with her father. Then she will hunch up her shoulders, look eager, and finally laugh out loud, bouncing up and down in her chair. So predictable is that a baby of 3-months will take on an expectant look, hunched shoulders, and will lean forward in her chair when she hears her father’s voice. It is as if she knew that her father’s presence would result in this special playful kind of communication.
Fathers, in turn, learn to expect very early to see this playful attitude on the face and in the body of the baby, and they respond to it with an expected, playful attitude. Even when the father is the primary caregiver, the baby seems to save a special “play” track for her father and a softer, smoother, less heightened set of rhythmic responses for her mother.
These predictable patterns indicate the importance to each of the participants of having a known set of behavioral signals which say to each, ”You’re here and I’m with you!”
I recommend you to read Tips and tactics to raising smart, cooperative and happy kids. This is the Parenting Tools That Are Guaranteed To Work For You And Your Child.
Please also read How to Understand Emotional Communication in a Baby
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