How to Understand Child Behavior

Berbagi dengan teman

Understanding Child Behavior

before understanding your child, it is important for parents to realize that their ability to shape a child”s behavior is limited by individual differences, present at birth. At birth, we see infants who overreact to every noise or stimulus-starting visibly, crying out, changing color, spitting up, and having a bowel movement- all as part of reaction to a single stimulus. Other infants will react to the same stimulus by lying quietly in their cribs, eyes widening, faces alerting, color paling, and bodily activity reducing to a minimum, seeming to conserve all energy in order to pay attention to the stimulus. These are both normal reactions, at different ends of a spectrum. The involvement of the infant’s whole body is apparent; attention and psychological mechanisms are intimately tied to physiological reactions. As babies get older, their physiological reactions may appear less connected to their personalities.

The parents cannot change the individual differences, they have some control over their own reaction to their child” s behavior. Often an eager or anxious parent will focus attention on and over emphasize a routine event, such as thumb sucking which is in itself of no importance, and reinforce it until it is a problem.

Parents are likely to focus on a common developmental aberration and reinforce it as a pattern at any age. They are likely to do so for unconscious reason and may not be aware of their role in reinforcing the behavior until it is already a habit. Even at this point it is not too late to relieve tension for the child and to break the vicious circle.

The parents may have to try and ignore child behavior, try not to give in, remove certain privileges, look and sound as if you mean it when asking you child to do something. Most importantly concentrate on encouraging and rewarding good behavior all the time

How To Cope Positively With Difficult Child Behavior.

• Establish House Rules

Make simple rules for your child. Start with a few "things we do and don't do." Discuss them with your child.

• Prevention Is Better Than Cure

If you feel that your child's behavior is beginning to get out of control, "nip it in the bud" by distracting your child's attention onto a positive activity or game.

• Understand Your Child's Behavior
  

Define simply and clearly any difficult behavior. Keep a diary of what led up to the behavior and what immediately followed it. From this, see if there is a pattern. What are the triggers and consequences which might be keeping the behavior going? DON'T blame yourself but work at changing your responses.

• Discipline With Short Time-Outs

Try to view discipline in a different way e.g. if a rule is broken, discipline with a time out a short, quiet time alone, without play. Alternatively ignore minor behavior difficulties as your attention will often inadvertently encourage the very behavior you want to stop.

• Take Five

When tensions and anger rise in you or your child take five. Take five minutes to cool down and to ask yourself, "Why am I getting so angry?" Try to identify the real problem, then find the solution. Always control your temper.

• Never Strike In Anger

Research has shown that hitting your child does not help, and can do more damage. Try to avoid striking your child in anger. Smacking is not effective in reducing poor behaviour, as it does not teach children good behavior.

• Don't Yell or shout at children

Try to avoid yelling at your children in anger. Do not put down your children. If they break a rule, tell them what they did wrong and why that makes you angry. Be angry at what they did, NOT at who they are.

• Get Away

When you feel frustrated, angry or uncontrollable, let your feelings out safely away from your children. Get out. Take a walk. Do not stay alone with your children when you are overwhelmed.